Brevity Is The Soul of Miami Neighborhood Guides

Midtown

instalagniappe

The vibe:

Trendy people who aren’t rich enough to live in Brickell OR are, but want more square feet and/or to be closer to Dior and Michael’s Genuine in the Design District. Also, fitness people.

Best things to do:

Work out at Barry’s, then eat all of the calories you burned at SUGARCANE or Brasserie Azur. Alternately, pre-game at Lagniappe House and then go clubbing at Bardot.

The Design District

instapal.jpg

The vibe:

Anyone who can afford off-the-rack Hermès, or has an affinity for some of the best food in Miami.

Best things to do:

At night: attend a (free!) Institute of Contemporary Art opening party, then grab dinner across the street at Michael’s Genuine. If it is day time, window shop at Céline and Tom Ford, hang out in the swingy chairs (and take Instas) at Palm Court, then grab a slice of pizza at Harry’s.

Wynwood

instajwakefield

The vibe:

Hipster kids who still live in Kendall or Oakland Park with their parents but sit at Panther Coffee on their Macbooks all day, not-a-regular-dad-I’m-a-cool-dad(s) visiting from the UWS, foreign Instagram models who need a new pic in front of graffiti.

Best things to do:

Be predictable AF and take Insta’s at the Wynwood Walls while dodging other people’s selfie sticks, nourish yourself after excessive posing with a $15 protein shake or acai bowl at Jugofresh, meander around random galleries (though most of the good ones have uprooted to Little River by now), shop at Style Mafia, pick up some challah or avocado toast from Zak the Baker.

Brickell

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The vibe:

Successful young professionals, or unsuccessful ones with rich, generous parents.

Best things to do:

Walk around and pretend you’re in Manhattan, minus the cold weather plus yachts. Take #architectureporn pics. Workout at the exhale spa or David Barton, then refuel at Area 31, Komodo, or Whole Foods. Lounge around your super trendy apartment complex.

Sunset Harbor:

instaharbor

The vibe:

Same as above, but with a particular affinity for ~health~

Best things to do:

Kill cals at Anatomy at 1220 or Flywheel, followed by Jugofresh or Sunset Juice Cafe. Walk the half mile or so to Lincoln Road and shop for new outfits at Zara, followed by a beach stroll.

South Beach:

instaversace

The vibe:

Girls named Oksana and Paulina who may or may not be prostitutes, groups of people from Omaha attending a bachelor(ette) party and feeling confused about whether or not the cocktail prices at STORY are real or not, the occasional cool Miami resident.

Best things to do:

Lounge around the pool at Hyde or The Delano, hang by the beach, get dinner at the Versace Mansion (or stay there if you’re Kylie Jenner/J. Biebs), go clubbing at STORY. If it’s Sunday, maybe hit up Nikki Beach. Walk your dog at South Pointe Park, if you’re in a chill mode.

Mid-Beach:

instaeditionb

The vibe:

Cool people from New York who have 227.9K Insta followers, South American grandparents who randomly and fortuitously bought real estate here in the 90’s, lots of traffic.

Best things to do:

Hit up the rooftop at the 1 Hotel after SoulCycle, grab dinner at Soho House, be ~lowkey~ and hang out at the Freehand, pre-game at Faena House then go clubbing at Basement, LIV, or WALL.

 

instamid

[Actually Mid-Beach, not South Beach…THE GEO TAG IS WRONG]

 

Honorable neighborhood mentions:

Aventura/North Beach for Flywheel and mall shopping, Miami Lakes for stalking the coolest rescue dog ever and its owner, MiMo for trendy, hipster brunch scenes, Coral Gables for more SoulCycle and shopping.

 

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